Thursday, December 9, 2021
Don and I worked for the Ontario Federation of Agriculture in the late 1960s. He was a great friend and mentor. Don was full of stories, often with a salacious twist. Witness this one from his days as property manager at the OFA. The property manager acted on behalf of farmers who had property problems with corporations and government bodies. Often this was about utility corridors and expropriations. One case involved a cow. As Don told it, the farmer was driving his cows along the ditch where the telephone company had recently removed a pole line -- but not filled in the holes. One cow stepped on the edge of a hole just as the bull got amorous. The cow's leg went into the hole and got broken. The cow had to be destroyed and the farmer wanted compensation. Don had long conversations with the lawyer for the phone company and all the facts of the case were established. Don thought it was all settled when the lawyer -- we'll call him Mr. Smith -- brought up another issue. "We have established that the cow as not in heat," the lawyer said "so the bull's behaviour was an unnatural act and my client cannot be expected to pay for the results of an unnatural act." Don collected himself. "Mr. Smith," he said. "Are you a married man?" There was a silence while the lawyer imagined himself before a judge. The telephone company settled. Vintage Don Middleton.
